Tip of the Week – Reclaim Your Power
Reclaiming Your Power
I’ve had a lot of examples over the last 2 weeks where I have encountered people who are filled with what I call “headtrash”. They are so focused on the ways that the job search has failed them. They don’t believe that they are ever going to find work. They are scared and they are desperate. Some of you are in this position, some of you are not.
When people are laid off from companies, they feel like their whole identity has been stripped away from them. Their circle of friends were normally just the people who they worked with. Many people have sat at the exact same desk and gone to work at the exact same time for years and years. Everything about them was defined by the job that they used to do. Sometimes their job/industry has disappeared completely. When that job is gone, they feel empty, hurt and rejected.
The job search itself is a defeating process if you don’t address it correctly. You pin all your hopes and dreams on that little apply button. “I’m perfect for that job, I’m sure they will hire me”. People wait by the phone and nothing happens. You stir up all this momentum to sit and wait for something that will never happen.
Some people get into a state of “headtrash” even when they are still working for a company. They think that whatever it is that they are currently doing is the only thing that they know how to do. They hope and pray that they can just continue to collect a pay check and that they won’t be a casualty of a lay off.
To all of this headtrash – I say – BE GONE!
I was working with a particularly bad case of headtrash. A friend of mine (I’ll call her Sarah (not her real name)) has been looking for work for the last 18 months. Nothing Sarah has done has resulted in gainful employment. Her husband also lost his job at the same time and he frequents himself with deep thoughts of depression and suicide. Sarah has reached a very desperate point trying to figure out how she’s going to put food on the table for her family. This once very strong Director of Sales is always holding back tears.
Lately when I’ve been working with Sarah. I have been trying to get her to step back into a place of empowerment. I ask her to think about the days when she confidently walked into the office and stole the show. Back in her glorious days she was able to negotiate multi-million dollar deals with her eyes closed. I forced her to go back and sit in that space again. Feel what it felt like to have that kind of power.
At first she wasn’t so sure about this process that I was taking her down. But, as she closed her eyes and reached back in her memories her posture began to change, a smile spread across her face and her whole energy about her shifted. Even though the last 18 months have defeated her, she could still go back and sit in her place of power. No one can take that from her.
Not all of you are as bad off as my friend Sarah. Some of you are just slightly wounded souls. Some of you are even at a point where you are becoming fed up with your current situation.Some of you are just starting the job search process.
To each of you, this week, I encourage you to go back to a moment in your life where you were proud and confident. It can be work related or not. Close your eyes and remember every single detail you can about that moment. Sit quietly in that moment for as long as you can stand it. If you must, set the timer on your phone for 5 minutes (or more) and just give yourself permission to go there and relish in every tasty detail. How did you feel that morning when you woke up? How did you feel that night when you got home? What are the details surrounding that perfect moment? The more emotion you can muster, the better!
This moment is your POWER moment. When you start to feel a little beaten – reclaim your power moment. When you start to feel a little depressed – reclaim your power moment. When you start to feel a little hopeless – reclaim your power moment. When you start to feel frustrated – reclaim your power moment.
Every time you sit at your computer and send out an email to ask for a meeting – sit for 5 minutes in your power moment. Before every single interview (informational, phone screen, in person, whatever) sit for 5 minutes in your power moment. Any time you are about to make a big decision affecting your career, sit for 5 minutes in your power moment.
You are an EXPERT in something. Reclaim that power!
I am not a therapist or a counselor. I have no formal training at all. However, I promise you that if you take the time to feel your power again you WILL start to feel more powerful things begin to happen in your life.
Try that out this week and report back to me on the changes that you start to see. ![]()
The Job Seeker Tip of the Week is published Each Week in the Job Seeker Newsletter.